You admire a speaker’s stories, silences, and closing words. Then you prepare your own talk—and their rhythm becomes your rhythm.
Admiration is not the problem. Believing you must become that person to be worth hearing is. A borrowed voice gives you another job: maintaining an adopted persona while trying to deliver a message.
Study the Principle, Not the Personality
In Stand Up, Speak Up & Show Out, I ask:
“Are you studying their personality, or are you studying the principles beneath the performance?”
A pause gives listeners time to absorb a difficult truth. A funny opening lowers tension. A story makes an abstract idea visible. You can learn those mechanics without borrowing someone’s accent, swagger, or personal history.
Borrow the principle, not the personality. Instead of “They sounded powerful,” recognize: “They stopped speaking after the central point so the audience could consider it.”
Notice Where You Leave Your Voice Behind
A borrowed voice often shows up in language first: an impressive word replacing a clear one, or a sentence you would never normally speak.
Imagine a trainer opening a session on listening with: “Today, we embark upon a profound journey into the transformative power of empowered leadership.”
When asked what the session is actually about, they answer: “Sometimes we are so busy preparing our answer that we miss what the other person needs.”
There is the real opening. It names something a listener recognizes immediately.
In Transformational Speaker Trainer, I emphasize finding your core message before you dress it up. Authenticity does not mean refusing technique; it means applying technique without surrendering your voice. Practice to know your message so deeply that you can explain it simply in your own natural phrasing rather than hiding behind someone else’s cadence.
The Takeaway
You can grow as a speaker without becoming a copy.
- Identify the functional principle beneath an admired speaker’s performance.
- Replace stiff, borrowed phrases with language you naturally use.
- Clarify your core message in plain words before refining delivery.
Coming next: How to receive feedback on your speaking without turning every suggestion into a verdict on your worth.
You do not need someone else’s voice to begin. If you want support developing your own, explore coaching.
